Rage Against the (Washing) Machine

Did I mention that the other day, the washing machine turned out a suspiciously dirty load of washing?

Or that, on further investigation, it seemed that the washing may also have been suspiciously dry, on account of the fact that the washing machine isn't working?

Or that it seemed that the door catch no longer engaged with the lock, and consequently the machine wouldn't start?

Or that, when jiggled about, it would, and it washed, but then wouldn't open?

A repairman has been called.